Ian Kerner's Sex and Parenting Tips

Rev things up in the bedroom and have "the talk."

By Lori Leibovich

Touch More

Holding hands, stealing kisses, spooning—nonsexual physical closeness is critical to healthy relationships. These quickie hookups, says Kerner, "help establish a connection inside the bedroom."

 
be spontaneous

Don't plan ahead when you have an evening alone together—just see where the night takes you. "Dopamine, the neurotransmitter that plays a role in the brain's pleasure center, thrives on unpredictability," he says.

 
clean house
 

Studies show that for a woman to enjoy sex, the anxious side of her brain needs to deactivate. So Kerner tells men to do more household chores: "Turning her on is about helping her turn it all off."

 
just do it

"Sex is its own aphrodisiac," says Kerner. In other words, you have to have more sex to want more sex. And try not to give in to the old "I'm too tired" excuse. "Sex actually energizes," he explains.

 
edit yourself

"When kids ask about sex, parents often freak out and give too much information," he says. "If a boy asks what a vagina is, he's not asking you to explain the birds and the bees. It's just a simple question."

 

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