Leaves of Three, Let It Be
Deep down, waaaaay deep down, past the layers of environmentalism, liberalism and all the other isms, a small selfish nugget of moi was secretly okay with global warming, because the thought of a mild winter here in New York, preferably lasting from Christmas Eve through no later than President's Day, greatly appealed.
Now I'm not so sure.
Because along with the parade of other horribles blamed on global warming -- holes in the ozone, dying frog populations, Osama Bin Laden (somehow, there's got to be a connection. I just know it) -- now they tell us that it's also responsible for a new, more poisonous poison ivy. Here's why:
Rising ambient carbon-dioxide levels create ideal conditions for the plant, producing bigger leaves, faster growth, hardier plants and oil that's even more irritating.
Yet one more reason the only safe way to go is to shut the door, close the blinds and turn on the television.
But if you insist on sending your kids outside for some fresh air, detoxify them with this upon their return. Because the only thing more miserable than a kid with poison ivy? You with poison ivy.
Climate changes are making poison ivy more potent [Wall Street Journal]
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